Making and Honoring Commitments — GROW Counseling
There is but one acceptable degree of commitment…Total.
~ Gary Ryan Blair
The new year often starts with people creating resolutions, in hope for change. They set a variety of goals such as: to lose weight, to read more, or to prioritize their mental health. Yet, most people give up on their commitments before the first month even ends, according to statistics.
For most people reading this right now, accommodations to their strict resolutions have already occurred. What makes that happen?
The root issue springs from the fact that we struggle to honor commitments to ourselves. Since most resolutions are self-focused, they are far easier to break. On the other hand, when we make commitments to a friend, direct consequences happen when we break them. We risk offense and the potential ruin of the relationship. As a result, we tend to take our commitments to others more seriously than the ones we make to ourselves.
With commitments to ourselves, we don’t face the same consequences of loss due to a lack of accountability.
Yet I would argue that the most important commitments we can make are the ones we make to ourselves. They may appear less risky. However, when we don’t stick to our personal commitments, we risk losing our ability to trust ourselves.
Often we get stuck in a pattern of prioritizing others. While it’s important to remain reliable to others, first we need to be able to rely on ourselves. What good is it to consistently keep your word to others, yet constantly drop the ball when it comes to your own goals? What’s keeping you from valuing yourself?
If you find that you’ve fallen off the wagon of personal commitment, don’t fret! The good news is that you can always start again. It may take a bit of adjustment to get better grounding.
People struggle to stick to goals because they lack a strong foundation for that intention. Before setting a goal, recognize why you’re setting it in the first place. Understanding the purpose of your goal enables you to stick to it.
For instance, if your goal is to lose weight, determine why weight loss is important to you. Consider potential consequences of not losing weight. Acknowledge the specific reasons why your goal matters. This allows you to take it more seriously. Once you know your why, move on to your how.
Develop an action plan you feel good about so you can commit to it for the long term. Once created, share your goals. Having an accountability partner offers inspiration and encouragement on days when it’s hard to stay committed.
Create goals that are S.M.A.R.T. -
Specific
Measurable
Attainable
Relevant
Timely
This year, make a decision to stay totally committed to your personal SMART goals! After all, the most important relationship we have is the one we have with ourselves. Do it because you’re worth it.
Written by: Salima Hart
Originally published at https://growcounseling.com on February 5, 2021.
